“Claire, you are so smart; you’re smarter than adults who should know better.”

“Mom, there’s stuff that you don’t know.”

“No Claire. Sometimes I just pretend not to know stuff so that you feel better about yourself.”

“Oh”

Social media more and more pervades our spaces including our schools. As a school teacher, I know I walk a fine line as a role model. As a role model there are certain rules I have for myself.

I am on Twitter. I make no qualms about this and I was there more than a year before Oprah made it “cool.” I tweet about whatever I want, and I realize my audience is mostly not my high school students. Of course, I am not an idiot either, so I don’t write noxiously about students. If I mention them it’s vague and never comes near a FERPA issue. If I have a strong rapport with a student and they request to follow me on Twitter, if they actually use their account (post, follow, etc…) then I may follow them back. If not, I may actually block them; nothing personal. I protected my updates before, but seriously, this is a place to connect with new people and network so how does that work when things are blocked. Sure people see things they take the wrong way, things they don’t agree with, and things that just annoy them. Well, stay away. You don’t need follow me.

I am on Facebook. I made my Facebook account to connect with a group of students years ago. I use it all of the time, but I use it mostly to see who’s doing what, keep up with old friends, classmates, families, and also networking events. I am friends with hundreds of former students and many current ones. I teach Facebook workshops to Boomers and other groups. There are problems I have with Facebook and things I don’t like, but the positives out weigh the negatives. I don’t lambast people, I don’t post anything inappropriate, and I don’t post controversial stuff. Anything that is mildly questionable, I warn my viewers. You know what, if you don’t like my Facebook, don’t follow me. Don’t friend me. Don’t watch my page. Why don’t I just change my preferences? Make it “Friends Only”? Because, in part, I am on Facebook for the same reason you are. For people I once knew to find me. How will they if I block access because people complain?

When I first followed Heather Armstrong, she was interesting because she’s one of the first people who publicly came out to say that she was fired for blogging. I think her being fired was the best thing that ever happened to her. Her and her husband both now live off the money they make from their blogs.

Social media is going to seep further into our schools. More and more kids will request to follow me on Twitter. Some I will add, some I will block. Others will follow me on Facebook. It’s not creepy. It’s a way to connect with people. I won’t ever lie in either of these venues, but I will not post inaccurate information either. I also am not ever responsible for anyone else’s actions or comments. They’re not mine. If you don’t like a comment, contact that person. If you don’t like what someone writes, ignore them. Don’t try to hurt them for your own personal gain.

The fear is schools will need policy social media. Sure they already block these things, but there is so much good coming out of it. If I wasn’t online, kids couldn’t contact me all of the time for help. I couldn’t podcast to communicate with kids and parents. Kids couldn’t “chat” me on my phone from anywhere in the world. Kids couldn’t call my personal Google voice phone number. My god, I give the kids a phone number now. Tell me one other public school teacher who has their phone number on their syllabus. Go ahead. Without teachers moving online and working with kids where they already are, how do we continue to move forward with making learning meaningful.

I am a teacher. I am a role model. I care.

So the junior prom was coming up. I was pretty much on the out with my current “girlfriend”, and I just wasn’t into her anymore. We already had our tickets to the prom and it’s always nice to not burn too many bridges when breaking up. The auburn hair girl was in the outs with her current man, too, but they too were planning on going to the prom. Her brother drove her and her date, while I drove my date in my car. I don’t remember if I also drove my best friend or not.

Around this same time I had decided to get a scarab beetle tattooed on my chest. A major part of that decision was that as my life was changing I got this tattoo. It reminds me of some of what began around this time in our history, and for that I am grateful.

So now we come to the prom. We joined our group of friends for the dance, put our coats on our chairs, cameras on the table, and took to the floor. As the night progressed, I danced less and less with my date and more and more with this auburned hair beauty. I remember at one point we had what would be considered a train or sandwich going on, and she was in the middle. I realized the irony of the teacher coming over to ask us to move apart as I now do the same.

She and I continued to dance through out the evening, and I even remember the slow dances when we acquiesced to our own dates. I looked across at her with her looking at me over the shoulder of her date; I’d close my eyes, smile and imagine I was slow dancing with her.

When the dance ended I offered to drive her and her date home. Somewhere along the line, my best friend ended up in the backseat of my small hatchback along with the girl and her soon to be exboyfriend. The girl told her brother I’d drive them home; his reaction was “take care of my sister”. (In hindsight a) he wanted the privacy with his own date and b) I have.).

We drove through the twilight and went where we go after danced: Eat ‘N Park. My best friends snored in the back of my car, while the four of us went inside. I slide into the booth next to the girl and my soon to be ex was forced to sit across from me, next to where the new girl’s almost ex.

We had a nice meal, albeit I then dropped her off to say goodbye and good riddance to her exboyfriend, while my soon to be ex, best friend and I drove on down the street.

See this one time was sort of interesting. I’m still not sure who was there or why, but this was a place near where we’d get together with these groups. It was called Stone Shelter because it was just that. A large stone shelter in South Park. A place my parents suggested in the past to have gone “parking” even. A place now just a memory and razed long ago. I can’t tell you much about that specific day at that place other than there were three of us there. She was there and my brother, too. It was during one of his larger part of life. I wore my hair long, my cut off jeans low, and the Les Mis shirt I owned hung off my frame, mostly from the rain of that afternoon showers. We had a Frisbee that we flung about the grassed hillside

That evening I drove her home. Went inside to meet this supposed 4’ iguana that really was. Spike. What a name for a female iguana. I visited the lizard in her bedroom. The door closed. Her father wasn’t happy, so I was obliged to meet him. I went down into this 70s shag basement to do so. Me, the man boy, the college boy with the tattoos, baggy cut off jeans, moist, not quite dry or wet tshirt, longish hair in my face, and pager on my belt that kept vibrating. Him in his Dockers, his button down, and neutral colors socks. Hair combed back, moustache and engineering glasses. Not quite a meeting I’d imagined. I cared then what she thought. What he thought. I remember his eyes burning as I walked up the stairs later unable to hide my tattoos creeping out between my combat boots and the torn shorts. A permanent iguana, like hers, upstairs.

About 15 years ago a group of friends existed. They weren’t true friends, but they were a group who gathered around others. Someone knew someone else and the group kind of existed. In part, it grew, for me, as an extended friendship of siblings, geeks, and freaks. Some lived in a basements dabbling with DOS, BBSes, and Windows 3.1. Others dabbled upstairs in painting, photography and the arts. Some dabbled with themselves, and I still don’t know what brought the group together, per say, but I do know when I see it in the other generations.

There was one Tuesday in particular when a large part of the group ended up in downtown Pittsburgh. In Market Square we sat with the waves of spring washing upon us as late April was lambing its way towards the end of May and summer break for many. For me, I was almost done with Freshman year at Penn State.

I don’t remember everyone who was there or if I drove a group or we took the PAT, but I remember the one girl. The one with the crooked tooth smile, permed out redish auburn hair, and glasses. The girl with the torn kneeed jeans and green sweatshirt. I flirted with her. She flirted back. At first it was a “group thing”. The thing to do, but I remember later that same the day, eventually, the rest of the group dispersed. It was just her and me, and we didn’t stop flirting. I won’t ever forget the feeling of suddenly realizing we were the only two left, and the protection and excuses of being in the group dissipated. I remember the sudden realization that this was something else. For me, Something more.

This morning, in the guest bath…
me: OW!!!
Claire: What?
me: I hit my elbow!!!
Claire: Are you OK?
me: No! It hurts!!
Claire: Oh, don’t worry, it will only hurt for a minute…

Not only has Claire picked up a wonderfully elaborate vocabulary from her parents, she has now begun to invent her own words to add to Webster’s Dictionary: Clairious. As in, that’s so funny it’s clairious!

Claire and I arrived home tonight after escaping to Walmart for flower pots and other “necessities” to find her first passport in the mailbox. Though I’m sure she has yet to understand the relevance, I have a feeling that she soon will!

Hopefully we’ll be visiting our friends in Amsterdam before the year is out. Then maybe a weekend trip to Mexico… Or maybe Canada sometime. Then again, there is always time for London and Greece next year!

Here’s to another milestone surpassed by my 44″ tall, 44 pound, 4-year old daughter! I look forward to our many trips together. Love, Mama

We’d been attempting to come up with a cool place to have Claire’s birthday party, and we also wanted a place where we’ve not really been to a party. When Claire joined Karate recently, they offered her a free birthday party and we jumped on it. They have a two hour block on a weekend, and we chose today since my schedule isn’t great on Saturday’s this month. Donna set everything up from the cake and balloons to being in charge of RSVPs for Claire’s friends. This morning I ran around to get everything Donna had ordered and we got to Sandoval’s Freestyle Karate at around 1:30PM.

Her friends came at 2PM and Mr Garrett, her regular teacher, had cool activities for the kids while the parents were able to just sit and enjoy ourselves. I ran around shooting photos while they had a mini-lesson including board breaking. Later we all ate pizza and birthday cake before Claire opened her presents (with the help of Raegan!)

While her actual birthday isn’t until Wednesday, she had a wonderful day with her friends today. Next up is making cupcakes for her school party Wednesday, opening family presents Wednesday night, and playing with everything all week with Mimi.